I've been reading Game sites for about a year and a half, at first not for the Game advice and tips, but for their anti-feminist and gender realist content. Yet, I've never really tried to use Game. I have three major problems:
1) I'm an ex-shut-in. I spent college playing video games instead of engaging in social interaction and making friends. Indeed, whenever people would try to befriend me I would decline their friendships and when girls would express interest in me I would ignore it. In the last year I've been becoming much more social, but I still suffer from aftereffects of my wasted past.
2) I don't meet enough girls in the course of my daily life. I'm out of college. Gaming girls at work would be a bad idea for several reasons. As I'm a former shut-in, most of my friends are male and they are mostly nerds, meaning their friends are mostly male nerds, too. I go to bars occasionally, but the problem is I don't have any good drinking buddies. Only two of my friends go out to bars and such. One lives too far away to be a regular drinking buddy. The other is a drunkard who has cockblocked me in the past.
3) I suffer from approach anxiety. It's not that I'm too scared to approach random girls, it's that I can never think of any good openers (although I've heard that even "Hi" can make a decent opener since most AFCs are too cowardly to do even that). If I have a reason to approach them other than the fact that they are a cute girl at a bar, I'm fine.
Anyways, I was getting some late-night food with a friend last night when we ran into an old friend of his who was planning on going out to a nearby bar later. We ended up joining him.
My friend is very charismatic, but doesn't go after women. He's divorced with custody of his children and he doesn't drink, although he DDs a lot for his friends. My friend's friend was a gay guy, so he was outgoing and friendly.
The gay guy is a regular at the bar, so he knew everyone, including all the girls. One of his female friends accompanied us outside and soon another gay guy showed up. She was cute, blonde, somewhat skinny, and looked about 5 to 10 years older than me. The girl was friendly towards me, but I didn't talk to her much. They gay guys were the center of the conversation. I definitely should've talked more. My friend and the gay guy were talking a lot, so I should've engaged the girl in conversation.
We left that bar to go to another one and by this time both her and I were varying degrees of intoxicated. We talked a lot more a this bar and it was soon clear she was interested. I've read about negging countless times, but I always thought it seemed like a douchebag thing to do. I gave it a try and found it to be very effective.
At one point, she got really angry at me over a remark I made about straight girls at gay clubs. In retrospect, this may have been a shit test. My beta instincts were to apologize to her, but I managed to shake them off and passed with a mixture of redirection and humor.
I have no memory of most of the details of what happened at the second bar, but she ended up unbuttoning two of my shirt's buttons in a very flirtatious manner. Here's the weird part. I remember this event and her walking away, but I have no recollection what occurred in between - probably due to the alcohol. I was pretty drunk at this point. My friend says that she walked away to go the restroom, I was drunk and mistakenly thought I'd been rejected, and became a douchebag for the rest of the night.
I'm still irked at myself about my failure, but I did better than I expected I would. And I learned that if I'm trying to pick up a girl at a bar, I should limit the number of drinks I have (I had a pitcher of beer, a shot, and a mixed drink). Also, she said I have "pretty eyes." Every girl who has expressed romantic/sexual interest in me has said that to me soon after meeting me. I should find some way to take advantage of this.
Hopefully I'll have another chance to practice Game soon. The problem, like I mentioned before, is that I don't have very many friends who like to go out and going to bars alone doesn't sound like fun.
Good for you, lad. The more you do it, the easier it is.
ReplyDeleteI know I'm a little late with this reply (though to be fair, you haven't updated in a while either, we both got other things...), but I just wish to applaud your effort, valiant as it is.
ReplyDeleteI am in a shockingly similar predicament to yours. That said, in all honesty and fairness bars are the SECOND WORST place to go to pick up chicks (nightclubs or dance clubs being the WORST. At least most bars you can talk over the music...). And for guys like us, bars and clubs are "jock territory." It will always be an uphill battle... Furthermore, you're unlikely to get far with decent girls when looking to "pick them up" in bars, clubs, or similar public places. The ones most available are usually the ones you wouldn't ordinarily want. They may be down for a one-night stand, but that's about it.
I am curious how practicing "Game" is going for you. Does it really work?
I wish you the best luck nevertheless, but you may want to try different sorts of places or settings.
We all had to start somewhere. Bravo for taking the first step.
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